Crafty-Ass Witch

So, I pickled half of the beets I got at the pick your own last night. I used the Ball Blue Book spicy pickled beets. It calls for you to cook your beets, bring your brine & onions to boiling, simmer, add your beets to hot brine and heat throughout, hot pack your jars leaving 1/4″ headspace and then add brine leaving 1/4″ headspace.

So, I did all of this. I packed my jars, gave them a gentle whack on the counter a few times to settle them, packed them some more, whacked them again and adjusted so that I had the appropriate headspace. Then I poured my brine in and gave it a paddle through with a spatula for air bubbles. This is always a huge pain when not using wide mouth jars. I prefer the narrower mouth jars for pickles because there’s less chance of floating. Anyway, when I did this, I noticed immediately that my 1/4″ headspace beets suddenly went well above the headspace. I attempted to jam everything back in place and when that didn’t work, removed a few beets and tapped the jars on the counter again. More brine had to be added to bring back to the 1/4″ headspace, but, of course, now the beets were floating, so I couldn’t even tell if I’d stuffed everything properly or not.

So, I ask all of you canners… is this common? Did I hot pack my jars too much? Too little? It’s entirely possible I overpacked as the recipe makes 4 pints and I had 3 and a half pints and a jar full of brine leftover, but then I always have a lot of brine leftover and I didn’t measure out 4 pounds of beets, so it’s possible I underestimated. This is the second set of beets I’ve had float out of the three I’ve pickled and I’m not entirely sure why. (Though the brine on my first set was so dark, they could have floated and I wouldn’t have noticed) I’ve refrigerator pickled a fair amount of beets and don’t remember it then either. Should I not have given the jars a gentle rap on the counter to get things to settle more evenly? I should have removed the air bubbles even if it did set everything all assunder.

And, perhaps most importantly, if little bits of beets are floating out of the vinegar, are we all gonna die of botulism?

I’ve owed you all pictures and canning posts about stuff I’ve done for months. Months. (I canned strawberry-balsamic jam in May) I’ve got a bunch of posts from my pick your own excursion (plum sorbet, nearly sugar free plum ginger jam, sweet pickled beets, spiced pickled beets, pictures from my cucumbers, etc…) I… what can I say? I’ve been the combination of lazy and busy where all I really want to do is sit around and eat Hot Pockets while watching The Soup. Plus, the new apartment is faboo and we’re mostly settled in but it’s the kind of settled in where you put everything away so now you can’t find any of it. And the commute is killing me. It’s an easy metro commute, but a $8 a day ride. I can take two buses, costing me $3 a day, but it’s been taking me an hour and a half each way and still making late for work. Oh, metro, you fill me with impotent rage.

The result has been two weeks of feeling like I’ve been in a constant rush, especially when compounded with a busier time at work. So the idea of taking a picture of the excellent cous cous salad I made the other day and posting it with a recipe is less than appealing (oh, I took a picture, I’m just too lazy to upload shit from my camera). And I rebel from all of this rushing by reading sexy books and planting my ass firmly on my couch. It’s been bad for my wallet, my stomach and my ass.

Weirdly, it’s been especially bad for my wallet because during a month where we really were trying to scrimp and save, I’ve online shopped myself out this week. I had a Groupon for Shabby Apple that I used to get the most fierce dress (Emma Pillsbury is totally jealous), then I bought everything from Old Navy I didn’t need (I’m returning half of it, because, as always, Old Navy’s good stuff is only online in my size and they can’t maintain size consistency to save their lives, so I usually buy 1 item in 2 sizes and keep the one that fits) and then I bought everything from Amazon I didn’t need. A lot of it has been good deals and gift cards… maybe it’s my nesting instinct kicking in, but I feel the need to acquire stuff.

At least I haven’t made the fiancee go to the pick your own again. Because raspberries haven’t ripened and apples and tomatoes aren’t ready yet. I mean, because I love her. Yes, that’s totally it.

(Dear Internet – please forgive me, but I’ve not had time to transfer over, edit and post my pictures. I know, it’s a tragedy. I’ll edit and add later, I swear)

Can I make a confession? You won’t judge me, internet, will you?

I don’t like cucumber pickles. There, I said it, I don’t like ‘em, let the stoning commence!

Perhaps I should amend that to I don’t like store-bought cucumber pickles. I just don’t like the way they taste. Which is why discovering my love of pickled carrots, beets, kohlrabi, etc.. has been so surprising. It’s not the pickling process that I don’t like, it’s the spices. Which is why I approached this can jam with a heavy editing eye. My fiancee, however, loves pickles and is allergic to melon, so… time to pickle pickles!

Disclaimer the First: Now, there’s been some discussion in canvolution about editing/messing around with recipes. Let me just put it like this. Have you put up more than (arbitrarily) 5 recipes? No? Then don’t mess around with your recipes. You know what’s not fun? Botulism. Once you get an idea of how the process works and how to put things together, then you can start tinkering, but ONLY tinker with spices. (The addition of spices won’t alter the pH of your recipe, so you should still be safe) Around here, you can also start working on changing sugar content of recipes, but be warned that sugar is one of the preserving agents and if you use less sugar, it may not last as long/have as good a texture. (I personally would rather eat something quickly than wait 10 months to eat oversweet jam, but that’s me)

Disclaimer the Second: Have you noticed that all of my recipes for can jam have included some aspect of ‘do as I say, not as I do?’ Yeah, me too. I keep ignoring guidelines and then being annoyed when the recipe doesn’t turn out as planned. I know, it’s crazy talk. Anyway, what I’m saying is that I used the wrong kind of cucumbers to pickle with. Everywhere talks about using small, warty pickling cucumbers. When I was out at my favorite pick your own last weekend picking up plums, beets and blueberries (recipes coming when I have time, really, I swear!), I saw that they have cucumbers for sale in their store, so over I went. The cucumbers were lovely, long smooth cucumbers. Faced with the prospect of buying these or storebought, I bought these. Then I went home and got really into my pickled beets and plum chutney and left the cucumbers in the crisping drawer until yesterday. The sooner you pickle your cukes, the crisper they’ll be. So, I haven’t had a chance to try these pickles yet (and I won’t for a month, stupid mellowing time), but from packing the jars, I know they won’t be as crunchy as I like. But such is life and you know, I can always reuse the brine to refrigerator pickle more cukes if I need to.

So, adapted from the Ball Book Grandma’s 2-Day Dill Pickle Recipe (halved and added some spices to it), I give you… the pickles.

To start, chop your cukes into spears at about the right size for the jar and deseed. Place your spears in a clean, stainless steel bowl or crock (I used a large saucepot). Dissolve 1/2 cup pickling salt in 4 cups of water and pour over the cucumbers. Add cold water to cover, if necessary. Place a clean, inverted plate on top of the cucumbers and weigh the plate down (I used 2 pint jars filled with water). Let sit in a cool, dry place for 12-18 hours. I did this in the morning and then put it in the fridge while I went to work. I pulled it out after dinner when I was ready to pickle!

(I looked at a lot of different recipes to figure out what I wanted to do – some wanted you to presoak, some didn’t. None of them explained why. I decided that since I had the time, I might was well try it. From what I can tell, how the cukes react to water is how they’ll react to pickling long term, so soaking now means you don’t have to worry about swelling or shrinkage later)

Next, combine 4 cups (filtered) water, 3 cups white vinegar (5% acidity, no botulism please), 1/3 cup pickling salt (or kosher, but NOT table salt), 2 tbsps sugar and 1 tbsp of pickling spice (in a jelly bag, though a reusable teabag also works) in a saucepan. Bring to a boil, then cover and simmer gently for 15 minutes. Discard spice bag.

At the same time, sterilize your pint jars and prepare the lids. I also prepare my spices for each pickle jar here, so when the jars are hot, I don’t have to worry about measuring. If you’re the same way, divide out 1 tbsp dill seed (or 1 head of dill), 1 tsp mustard seed, 1/2 tsp red pepper flakes, 1 bay leaf and 2 cloves of garlic (whole) for each pint jar. Admire how pretty it is and take a picture.

Once you’re done with your spices, pull out your cucumbers. Drain the brine and rinse the cucumbers well. Then rinse them again. Once your jars are sterilized, pull them out of the water and pack the jars with cucumbers, leaving 1/2″ of headspace to the top of the jar. Pack them tightly, now. Like, squeeze ‘em in until you can’t squeeze any more. Then add your bay leaf and garlic and dump your seeds on top. (I try to get garlic cloves and bay leaves on the side for maximum pretty). Your brine should be ready by now, so discard the spice bag, grab your wide mouth funnel and pour the brine over the pickles, leaving 1/2″ of headspace from the top of the jar. Wipe the rims, add your lids, put back in your hot water bath, bring the hot water to a boil and process for 10 minutes. Remove from heat and let cool overnight. Voila! Pickles!

Pickles usually need 3 weeks to a month to mellow before they reach perfection. It’s kind of killing me not to be able to try it. (Ditto my pickled beets)

A Note on the Brine – I halved what the recipe called for, which was supposed to be enough for 7 pints. I filled 4 pint jars and made a jar of just pickle brine (I’d sterilized and prepared spices and a lid for a fifth jar just in case, and there is nothing sadder than an unused, simmered canning lid in Christina land) and still had enough left over for probably another jar or two. So while this made 4 jars for me, that’s only because I ran out of vegetables. This could easily make 7 well packed pint jars. Just be prepared to have leftover brine is all I’m saying. Either save it for future pickles (you can keep it in your fridge for a few weeks, then reheat to use in further canning), can it for forays into picklebacking or whatever. Also, the red pepper flakes dye it a lovely orangey color, something that didn’t happen when I made carrots in February. Iiiinteresting.

Without the Bajigeddy – Spicy Garlic Dill Pickles
small pickling cucumbers (lots)
1/2 cup & 1/3 cup pickling/kosher salt (divided)
8 cups water (divided)
3 cups white vineger
2 tbsps sugar
1 tbsp pickling spice
dill seed or fresh dill heads
mustard seed
red pepper flakes
garlic cloves

Wash your cucumbers, trim and cut into appropriately sized spears, deseed and put in a large crock or stainless steel bowl. Dissolve 1/2 cup pickling salt into 4 cups water and pour over cucumbers. Add more cool water to cover if needed. Cover with a clean inverted plate, weigh the plate down (bags/jars of water work well) and keep in a cool place for 12-18 hours.

Combine 4 cups water with 3 cups white vinegar, 1/3 cup pickling salt, 2 tbsps sugar and 1 tbsp pickling spice (in spice bag) in a large pot. Heat over medium-high heat to boiling, cover and simmer gently for 15 minutes. Discard spices. Remove cucumbers bowl, discard water and rinse cucumbers well twice. Pack cucumbers into hot, sterilized jars tightly, leaving 1/2″ of headspace to top of jar. Add 1 tbsp dill seed (or 1 fresh head of dill), 1 tsp mustard seed, 1/2 tsp red pepper flakes, 2 cloves garlic and 1 bay leaf per jar. Add hot brine to jars, leaving 1/2″ headspace to the top of the rim. Add lid and process in a hot water bath for 10 minutes.

And I’m afraid I’m starting to become one of them.

Back in ye olden days, when the internet was new and shiny and kids had to get their stupid video downloads from filesharing (because YouTube didn’t exist!), I was pretty active in the knitting community on livejournal. The community, while tons of fun, was beset with n00bs who asked posted questions like “how do I cast on?” or “my circular knitting turned itself inside out in my bag. What will happen now?!” that made a lot of us facepalm regularly. It was so utterly, utterly irritating that I promised myself I wouldn’t ever do this.

Enter my love of canning. For a good long while there, my canning recipes came solely from pickyourown.org (which I highly recommend – very clear, step by step instructions w/ lots of pictures). I got a copy of the Ball book for Christmas, but it took my mother 4 months to send it to me (bless her) and the can jam started in January, so I started relying on the internet for recipes and canning advice. Specifically, twitter. Post a question with #canvolution and Canvolution will probably retweet it. Within minutes, you have a few different people responding with an answer. I did this for my pickled beets when I was trying to figure out water/vinegar ratio for water bath canning. I did this when I was trying to figure out how to decrease the amount of sugar I use in canning without Splenda (answer – you can’t, really. Wah wah).

I’m starting to wonder if by doing this, I’m annoying the pants off of whoever runs the @canvolution twitter feed. While I keep the questions to a quasi -minimum and do a google search before asking, the information found on the internet (blogs, etc…) is often difficult to get a read on. Everyone has an opinion, but there’s rarely a consensus and rarely a USDA based opinion. When asking questions about techniques for knitting cast-ons, doing an improper one isn’t going to possibly give a loved one botulism, yanno? I’m trying to be extra careful, but it’s hard for me to balance the silly questions with the need to knows with whatever.

It boils down to – I want to learn, but I don’t want to piss off the internet. But it’s the internet, so you’ll always piss off someone. Also, I’m kind of insecure and tend to blog about it. Just in case you were wondering. 

Though I still can’t figure out if it’s OK to stack processed jars on top of each other or if I wouldn’t be able to tell if a seal breaks if I do.

(In other news, Doris and Jilly put together this highly awesome FAQ that has really helped me out. I took all of the rings off the jars I put in my pantry after our move. Also, Joel has a really helpful post about using alternate sugars while staying pectin free in jams.)

What is it about stuffing all of your possessions into boxes, paying exorbitant sums of money for someone to cart them across town, and then opening those boxes to rediscover what useless shit you have, despite sending 5 bags to goodwill and 5 to the recycling? Not to mention the frantic post-move clean that takes place at your old digs. Whatever it is, it really cuts in on my blogging time. We’re moved but are still in the process of getting our lives together and have very sporadic internet. Updates when I do something crafty that’s not finding new ways to carry 12 boxes to the dumpster in one hand.

Also, it’s freaking. hot. here in DC. So, you know, it’s hard to be in the mood to can. Or cook. Or do anything but go ‘oooomigaaaaawd it’s so hoooooooooooot.’

(Oh, metro, you fill me with rage)

Giant Suitcases
In the middle of the car
What, you want to leave?

I stand here confused
What is this farecard I hold?
Open, magic gate?

Oh strawberries. You are so sweet, so delicious so perfect when ripe and in season. I went down to Asheville, NC last month and picked up a gallon bucket of dead ripe strawberries for $12. These berries were tastier than anything you get from the grocery store, hands down. I made strawberry balsamic jam and this juice concentrate, as well as eating straight and making strawberry infused vinegar. I didn’t take a lot of pictures to make this, so we’re just going to go straight into the recipe.

But first, wash your strawberries! Strawberries hold pesticides and dirt and junk much more than other fruits. And while you’re at it, sign the petition to urge the USDA to reverse its decision to approve methyl iodide.

So, to make this, you take about 6 cups of hulled strawberries and puree it. Pour through a fine mesh strainer to remove the seeds. Next, squeeze 4 cups of lemon juice. This’ll take a lot of lemons and probably 45 minutes, unless you have a juicer. I got 3 bags of lemons from Whole Foods and went through two and a half. If you have a need for lemon zest, this’ll be a good time to make that recipe! I strained this again before combining with strawberry puree to catch errant seeds. Combine strawberry puree, lemon juice and 6 cups sugar in a non-reactive pot. Heat over medium high heat, skimming off phone until it reaches 190 degrees. Do not boil!

Fill 5 pint jars, leaving 1/4″ of headspace. Process in boiling water bath for 15 minutes.

To reconstitute, mix with 2 parts water or seltzer.

The Verdict: So, despite the 6 cups of sugar this recipe calls for, this makes a tart lemonade. But it’s delightful and refreshing. This also made 2 pints less than the 7 pints that the Ball book said it would make – either I had too little strawberry puree than they expected or… I don’t know. I frequently find that I make more or less than the recipe calls for so who knows. The Ball book also recommends doing a 1:1 reconstitution w/ water, seltzer or Sprite/7 Up/Sierra Mist, however when I made this, I found that 1:1 with water was cloyingly sweet. 2:1 works better. I was all set to skip the fresh squeezed lemonade and use bottled, but apparently lemonade made with bottled lemon juice tastes awful? I don’t know, my parents never loved me and made lemonade from concentrate. In other news, I have 6 bottles of lemon juice in my fridge – anyone need some? There’s also a lot of foam to skim off of this one. Worth paying attention to.

I also found that this is absolutely divine with vodka, so it makes a delightful adult addition to bring to summer BBQ.

My non-strawberry takeaways from Asheville, along with some dill seeds for pickling. Haven’t tried either yet, but I am excited to try!

I use a sonicare toothbrush and recently, it’s started vibrating too high and too fast. One of the mechanisms that keeps the vibrators in place has broken and as a result, it’s nearly out of control and uncomfortable.

That’s kind of how I feel right now. In the midst of dealing with my ankle, a stressful time at work, the stress of finding a decent place to live in the city, getting ready to move, not enough sleep, tension headaches from jaw clenching and a few other matters, I feel about at the end of my rope. I feel hard and I feel sad and I feel tired. Nothing is working the way I want it to right now, least of all me.

And the problem really is… We build up this idealized image of ourselves. Calm, competent, graceful, able to handle what the world throws at us. And for me, when that image doesn’t match up to reality, it’s somehow my fault for not being this fantasy of a person. For having negative emotions, reacting poorly to stress, for not being skinny enough, not being able to wear heels or go running or whatever. And you know, this isn’t hard. I mean, it is, finding an apartment is part kiss a lot of frogs, part beauty pageant and more expensive than it has any right to be, but it’s not bad enough that I should be as fragile as I am. I’m working, I have free time, I enjoy my life overall, I’m just having a rough time while we go through this. On Monday, I thought I was doing great. Last night, I lost it.

I’ve been going on this journey of self-discovery and self-improvement for years and yet somehow it still feels like I’ve just scratched the surface. And I don’t know what’s back there. I’ve got all of this pain and sadness and anger in me and I can’t articulate it or resolve it. Every time I let it out, I work through it and I think I’ve gotten better and yet when it comes again, it’s exactly the same.

I need to find a better way of being. I need to find a better way of reacting to stress and anger that’s not just internalizing it until I explode. I need to find a way to react to criticism that’s not outrage and injury. I need to think a few more steps ahead than I usually do. It’s just hard. It’s trying to go from one end of a jungle to the other, with no paths and angry monkeys to throw rocks at you. I just don’t know how to get there yet.

Anyway, I’ll get back to talking about canning or cooking soon. I’ve got two strawberry posts in the hopper, I just need to take some photos and find some time. HA.

So, with the strawberries I picked up in Asheville last week, I’ve made strawberry yogurt pops, strawberry infused vinegar, strawberry balsamic jam (post soon, I hope) and strawberry lemonade concentrate (again, post soon).

I canned the lemonade concentrate last night. Today, I am going to a BBQ at a friend’s house. Bringing a pint of the lemonade would be a nice idea. The problem? I can’t bring myself to do it.

Does anyone else have this issue? That they can’t bring themselves to open what they can until at least a month after they do it? Otherwise, what’s the point? I used a perfectly good canning lid on something I could have put in the refrigerator to use later. It’s actually a point of contention between my fiancee and I. I canned some really freaking good peach ginger preserves last October and found that she’d opened a jar to put some on her toast the next day.

Canning and preserving walks a fine line between wanting to enjoy something immediately (I almost always have leftovers that go in the refrigerator/freezer instead of the pot) and wanting to put something up for later. But when does later become relevant? I still have pints of preserved peppers I put up last October with no idea how and when I’m going to use them. If I don’t use the peaches I pickled last August now, when will I? They’re going to be past their use by date soon. Is it better to crack something open too early or wait until it’s too late and be sad about what might have been?

I put it to you, my fellow canvolutioners. How long do you wait to open something you’ve canned?